Making In-Laws Part of the Family

One of the biggest questions prior to Marriage is: "How am I going to get along with my in-laws?" This has been a dilemma since the beginning of time and with a few simple hints will be a non-issue in your Wedding planning process.

Courtesy is Key- Remember all those times your mother told you to mind you manners? This is one of the reasons why. Always say please and thank you to your future in-laws. It is simple but effective. This is the first and best way to show the parents of your love that you respect them.

Treat your fiancee/fiance with Respect- This should be a no-brainer, but it does need reminding. Most parents will freely give a blessing to someone who treats their child with respect. Always consult your love and treat her/him with dignity. This includes not grabbing at them in front of their parents.

Care about their issues- Not pretend to care; actually care about the goings on of their family life. Take interest in your fiance/fiancee's brothers and sisters. Show up for concerts and important parties. Remember their names and conversations you have had. Invite them to parties you're having. Take time to get to know these people who will be important to your lives.

Their Ideas Matter- Now that doesn't mean you have to always use their ideas in your wedding but every now and then, when you don't care about the topic of wedding planning, use their ideas. You also should weigh their ideas with your own. Remember it is an important day in your life but it is also an important day in theirs. What the Bride and Groom want should matter most, but you shouldn't dismiss their ideas just because you didn't think of them.

Now these aren't fool-proof methods, but if you honestly try, your future in-laws will see this and make an effort also. Family is important and yours is getting bigger. Take the time to acknowledge this and appreciate it. I was lucky enough to like my in-laws from day one, but they have always been great to me. If things don't start off on the right foot between you and the family, (as I was fortunate enough to have) then work at it, this is an important part of your life now and worth the effort. I now consider that I have Two sets of parents and an extra brother, I don't even make the distinction between in-laws and blood any longer and I am very happy with that.

--Mickey

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